The Thairrito Challenge 1

The Thairrito Challenge


Contrary to popular belief (probably fuelled by how I eat), I am cultured, kinda…

So, a season ticket pass to the Vaults Theatre Festival seemed like a lucrative prize. Plus, who doesn’t love burritos? It’s a nice switch up to the usual challenge type since I don’t get to do many burritos and get another competition under the belt.


Based on the description, the challengers would face a 1.5kg burrito behemoth made of:

Four tortillas, filled with traditional refried pinto beans, lemongrass and ginger jasmine rice, thai red kidney bean curry, spring onions, mild tomato salsa, superfine two-cabbage slaw, fried shallots and fresh coriander.


Other than being a burrito, I think the other thing that set this challenge apart for me was that it was vegetarian. I can’t recall if I’d ever done a non-sweet vegetarian challenge. First time for everything I guess. One before this would have been a ‘vegan wings’ challenge that not enough contestants turned up to so had to be called off.


The vegetarian aspect wasn’t the only surprise that day. When the contestants were told to take their places, imagine my surprise when I saw The Real Food Savage merrily sitting there. I think he was just as surprised to see me. So much for my hopes of a casual competition…

The burrito themselves were a lot bigger than I expected. For some reason I didn’t think a 1.5kg burrito would be bigger than my head. Still, getting through them was mostly easy work. The fillings were soft and juicy, meaning it was a breeze getting them down. Mostly. The final quarter were a challenge for the jaw, as that is where the four tortillas fused together to hold this creation together. This made for a serious jaw workout. The nachos were the hardest part of the challenge. It took me as long to get through a pile as it did through the whole burrito simply because…THERE JUST WAS NO WAY TO EAT THEM FAST! It was really a sad feeling, no matter how I tried, I just had to chase every mouthful with water since they immediately took all moisture out of your mouth, making it neigh impossible to swallow.

No special techniques here to be honest. I just took bit bites, and used water to help me get it down. The texture of the burrito made it a breeze to power through. The only parts where I started to use technique was with the end bits. I resorted to using my hands to tear them to smaller pieces to save my jaw having to chew so much. In hindsight, it would have been smart to put the nachos into the burrito to get them down easier without them drying my mouth out. You live and you learn.


This competition felt different, but it was enjoyable. The organisers put in a lot of effort, having intro music for each contestant and getting the crowd involved, which to my surprise was quite numerous. I want to give a special shout out to The Real Food Savage that made me work for it, keeping me on my toes to the very end. As for me, I’m looking forward to next year’s festival where I will be making full use of my newly acquired season pass.


If you’re interested to check the place out, you can find it at:


One comment on “The Thairrito Challenge

  1. Reply Ben Apr 22,2018 6:25 pm

    Congrats. Took me a few times to read before I realised you won it. What time did you do?

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